Thursday, April 24, 2008

The Apocolypse Must Be Near...

Oh yes, we've learned so much from the tragedies of 9/11 and Katrina, etc. Remember for that brief, day or so, how we all thought about what really matters in this life?

Yes, here is what I came across this evening, as reading it really warmed the cockles of my jaded heart!!!

It's all about that cute little cherub Miley know "Achy Breaky IlookandsoundlikeBillClinton Heart Billy Ray" Cyrus' daughter.

From MTV UK:

Miley Cyrus- the 15 year old star of kids show Hannah Montana- has signed a deal to write her first book.

Disney- who also make her TV show, film, albums and merchandise- will release her autobiography in 2009.

According to reports the book will focus of Miley’s relationship with her mother and family.

Christian Cyrus said she wanted to: “motivate mothers and daughters to build lifetimes of memories together and inspire kids around the world to live their dreams."


Oh my god.

(said with a whiny country accent) "It waw-s the best of tah-mes, it waw-s the worst of tah-mes"

What in the HELL is she going to write about?

"....and then I got my period."

Ridiculous and audacious don't even begin to describe this travesty of pulp.

Gas prices are so high that most Americans cannot even take a vacation this summer, rice is vanishing as a staple, foreclosures are at their highest ever, but a 15-year-old pop star deserves a seven figure salary, because we all need to know when her breasts started developing.

"Diddy said I could sing too..."

What a sick, sick culture we live in.

I hope they offer her "racy" pictures as a special DVD insert to the book. Maybe she'll go to rehab during the book's publication, and they'll have to add an 'Epilogue' to her distinguished career.

Hell, maybe we should just give her a Kennedy Center Honor, along with honoring the distinguished careers of Cato Kaelin, Paris Hilton and Britney Spears.

Bea Arthur will sing a tribute to Miley, and Patti LuPone will sing selections from the upcoming Andrew Lloyd Weber musical "At Least We Have Paris."

And the "American Idol Loser" chorus will sing a tribute to Cato Kaelin.

The ideas are limitless.

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